Treasure Hunt

It took a few months before your mum fell pregnant with you. During that time we were keeping our intentions top secret, using the codename Project Windmill whenever we were talking about trying to have a baby.

So we were very excited when the good news finally came (in the form of a stripe on a pee stick).

I wanted to celebrate the news, so I made your mum a secret treasure hunt. When she got back from work, I called her from the pub and asked her to look in the fireplace.

She found a ribbon there, and followed it all around the room, and out the window, across the front of the house and back in through the front door. At the end of the ribbon was a web address: http://bit.ly/emmaplusone.

At that address was a presentation of lots of joyous quotes about pregnancy - one of which contained a microdot. The microdot directed your mum to look inside a particular book on our shelves.

The book had been hollowed out, and contained a memory stick. On the memory stick were these seven photos:

Salvator's trail revealed a musical sequence, which converted to letters, which converted to numbers, which converted to coordinates, which pinpointed a tree outside our flat. (I'm very proud of your mum for finding it - it wasn't easy!)

On the tree was another memory stick, which contained a poem:

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Emma is Egnant and Preggers with Plus One

Embly is Carrying Daughter or Plus Son

Gravid, parturient, fecund, expecting

Eating for Two and Tummy Projecting

Fertile, With Child, happy and fat

Emma is carrying Substitute Cat

Exciting! Exciting! Nerves and joy fill our minds

And distract our attention at improper times

SerenPenelopeCamScarletDipity

ByronChristanielDeanCalvinJiminy

What shall we name him, who shall she be?

Will you be pregnant again when she’s three?

Where will we live? Vermont? Guildford? Brixton?

Will you work for Fair Trade? Will I sell all my scripts on?

Will she grow to be pretty? Will we care for him well?

Will the pregnancy work? Will the labour be hell?

One thing at a time, nine months to go yet

Before you give birth to Human Pet

(Who’ll grow up on Simpsons and comedy shows

And crocheting, board games, calligraphy, Go)

First you must solve this treasure hunt clue

That your boyfriend slash husband created for you

As a ^symbol his lovinj will never run short

And a ^sign that he offers bOUNDLESS sUPPORT

You’ve done well so far to have followed the trail

Of ribbons and websites and Salvator’s tale

{A square like a capital E, and inside

A circle – the womb where our child will reside}

The next clue location’s despicably clever

Lucky that Mummy’s as brainy as ever

On t’Interweb, find that most modern of media

Something dot org, an online-opedia

Look up the word that’s been causing you glee

Starts with a P, means the words on line three

Now here’s the cunning part; to solve the mystery

Click on the tab at the top called View History

There’s a list of revisions way back through time

Check out August 3^rd  at eleven oh-nine

Blastocyst bedded, on with the show

Bun in the oven, Proj Windmill is go!

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You can follow the next clue yourself! That led to a puzzle, which in turn led to a final clue.

The treasure at the end was a star, engraved. And, of course, you.